The Net (1995)
Last Watch Date - March 2, 2025
Total Times Watched - 2x?
Comments
The Net is a little movie about computers, programming, software testing, ... backdoors, Theft, MURDER! But it's from the mid-90s and stars Sandra Bullock. Is it any good?
This movie is really funny to me not strictly because of the goofy 90s computer stuff, which is definitely funny, but because of how utterly stupid the plot is. The basic gist is that some 90s Elon Musk guy is scamming all of these companies with his software, scamming them of everything and wielding ultimate power through the guise of "protection" and "security." That aspect is NOT dumb, it's the execution of it that really makes it stupid.
It seems like "hackers" and computer people in movies are either disgustingly obese, sweaty neckbeards OR super hot people. There's no in-between. To be fair, I don't think Sandra Bullock is super hot personally, but she's been a megastar in movies for ages so I think she counts. Her adversary in this movie is a handsome fella as well. He's simultaneously James Bond and a James Bond villain. Guess what that means! Yeah, you guessed it, a weird "romantic" subplot that turns into a "you should've killed her instead of banged her" cheeseball thriller.
There isn't really any chemistry between Sandra and the other dude. It seemed forced from the get-go. From the audience perspective, it seemed incredibly obvious that he was the bad guy right off the bat. What's the fun in that? Especially when you know she's going to "win" in the end. The whole movie is predictable and follows the same path heavily trod by so many other hollywood thrillers, but this one has no style, no substance, nothing to make it stand out. It's only memorable in its lack of memorable details. I could've skipped rewatching this and had a better opinion of it.
Recommended?
No, it's stupid. It's not the computer stuff that bothers me, but the tired plot and lack of character chemistry. Oh yeah, and Dennis Miller does NOT fit in this at all.
