2022 Postseason Predictions.. Pre-season!

August 22, 2022

My picks last year were so damn good that there's no reason NOT to make more for 2022, right?

Starting in the AFC East, I see no reason for the Bills to be dethroned. The Jets should be better, but who knows how much Wilson will even play (or if he's any good at things other than banging his buddies' moms). New England is breaking in a new OC with a young QB which makes me think they're going to struggle this year. The Dolphins have a new coach and Tua is probably not the answer unless the question is "who's a QB you don't fucking care about?"

The Bengals schedule is TUFF like McGruff - that's what they get for going to the Super Bowl! Idiots!!! They're going to drop a few of those games, leaving the Ravens to take the division. Lamar has to be better this year. I put the Browns below the Steelers because they're an abomination franchise in an abomination city. Eat a dick, Cleveland. Eat Deshaun Watson's unsolicited dick.

The Colts have to win this year. I actually think they'll blow it again somehow, but I'm putting them on top because THEY HAVE TO. The Titans have a solid team again, but I think Henry is going to run out of steam soon. The rest of the division is terrible.

KC won't be dethroned in the West. LA has the right roster to do it, but they're the Chargers and blowing it is what they do. The Broncos will be better maybe but I think letting Russ Cook too much is going to leave them in the bottom.

Hey, you know what sucks? The NFC East. The Cowboys have no real competition in this and the Commanders are a joke. On the field, too. I think the Giants have the potential to be ok but I got tricked by them last year. My hard spot for them has grown soft. Wait.. E A G L E S BASEMENT!

I hate the Packers, but who is realistically going to win this division otherwise. The Pack improved their team, especially on defense. The Bears have a new coach and a theoretical offensive line. The Lions actually might surprise us this year. The Vikings are one Kurt Kuzzins from winning some real games.

Tom Brady is back AGAIN to take a run at the Super Bowl with the Bucs. The Saints are breaking in a new coach. The Falcons are bad. The Panthers are worse, but I hope Baker gets some new commercials in Charlotte.

The NFC West is maybe the most interesting division in football. The 49ers have the best roster aside from their QB, which means they'll win like 10 or 11 games and make a wild card. The Cardinals are doomed to eternal suffering and their new black uniforms/helmets make me hate them. The Seahawks are going to start Geno Smith or Drew Lock. Let that sink in. I also watched them in the preseason against the Bears and they made Chicago look like a potential playoff team. Disgusting.

Ultimately, I see the Packers and Bills slaying their playoff demons, before the Bills FINALLY get over the hump and win one for the Gipper! Or uh Jim Kelly's jaw!