The Crawlers (1990)

Last Watch Date - August 16, 2023
Total Times Watched - Twice


The last time I saw this movie, I was probably 12 or 13. For reference, I am 40. So, uh, yeah, it's been a while. I did remember this movie being bad and obvious b-grade clunk, so my expectations were .. that. 

My memories were correct! This movie is terrible in a very b-movie way. The entire premise is so stupid that it's hard to believe it exists: nuclear waste is dumped in a forest, causing the tree roots to become carnivorous and chase humans around for that sweet food. Although they don't actually seem to really eat much, more just kill people and making whip crack sounds.

I'm not going to pretend this is a normal movie and review it as such. The acting is fittingly atrocious. The script makes absolutely no sense and has really cool lines like "Oh no!" about 40 times. When the townspeople are warned, they respond by shooting at people. It makes sense! IT ALL MAKES SENSE!

The big highlight for me was what I remembered the most: a helicopter explodes near the end and is very clearly a toy. I had such a vivid image of it and oh man it lived up to it. It's hilarious how stupid it is. 

The whole movie is currently on YouTube and probably will always be because who is going to bother copyright striking it? 


I mean.. are you in the mood for a terrible movie? If so, sure! It's really stupid. 

6 Twigs out of 10

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