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J-E-T-S JETS JETS MEH!

The Jets got new uniforms and a new coach. That means they get covered first, right?!

Let’s check out how this division played out last year.
New England 11-5
Miami 7-9
Buffalo 6-10
New York 4-12

Hey, that’s a pretty bad division. But the worst of the worst was the good ol’ Jersey Jets.

YOUR New Jersey Jets!

Why is this the year they make the playoffs?

Well, they got new uniforms. That’s something, right? They got new helmets from the Emerald City, and that means BIG THINGS from them this year! The Jets have a real chance to start out 2-0 with games against the Bills and Browns, both at home. They follow that up with 2 sure losses on the road in New England and Philly. The next two games are no kinder to the Jets, as they have to play at Dallas and against New England again. I’m not saying they’ll definitely drop both of those games to New England, but they’re definitely going to drop both of those games. Wrapping up their last two games of the first half of the season, they have winnable games against the Jags and Dolphins.

Best case scenario, they enter the second half of the season at 4-4, but more realistically, I am expecting a 2-6 record. The good news is that they got both of their Pats games out of the way early! The bad news is that they still have to play most of the NFC North and NFC East. They have the BATTLE OF NEW JERSEY against the Giants to kick off the second half of the season, which is neither a home nor away nor neutral site game. It’s all of those. The Giants were bad last year and they’ll probably be bad this year as well, but this is a toss-up game. They follow that up with a trip to Washington DC Maryland to play the Skins, a team with a journeyman QB and a rookie who may be injected into the starting lineup by this point of the season. The Skins have a great defense, but they’re punchless on offense. The next 3 games are winnable as well, with Oakland and Miami making the trip to the Northeast, with a short road trip to Cinci in between. The final three games are probably losses, with Baltimore, Pittsburgh, and Buffalo on the schedule.

So how do I see them faring? Best case, 7-9 with a stolen game from Baltimore or Buffalo late. Worst case? 2-14, with a streak of bad losses in the back end of the season.

My 100% accurate, totally unbiased prediction: 5-11

You heard it here first, cuties. Don’t bet on the Jets!

JB Smoove can do so much better…
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